WE MUST BE MAD!!

The insanity just never ends here at TIRC Exitprises! The company made an official statement this past Monday during a press conference called by company CEGO (Chief Executive Goof-Off) Harvey Floorbanger that they would be “GIVING AWAY FOR FREE” downloadable copies of its latest release on its struggling “TIRC Records” subsidiary. Dissatisoul from local St. Louis “garage-punk” (ahem) HEAVYWEIGHTS Left Arm is being released on the company website for a “recommended” “donation” of anywhere from three to five bucks. But who do they think they’re kiddin’? Any thrifty Beatle Bob out there in consumer la-la land knows that music is just out there (everywhere) for THE TAKING, so why not just put down that hoagie, grab it, and run like a jackal? And indeed, you CAN! Actually, there’s no need to even RUN (nor try to stealthily sneak it inside your favorite smoking jacket). No siree, Bob. No shame, a-tall! Just go to the online store and, with trusty mouse in hand, click the LEFT ARM CD cover and download away!! I mean, LOOK AROUND… No one’s going to see you do it from the privacy of your PC there. It’s just like downloading kiddie porn!! Now, any of you out there from more distinguished, cultured upbringings who may encounter feelings of guilt after doing so MAY, if you so desire, of course, return to the scene of the crime and pay a few bucks for it, but that’s only if you feel REAL GUILTY. Because obviously if there’s no guilt, there’s no CRIME!

Oh yes there’s Trouble, right here in River City… That starts with “T” and that rhymes with “C” and that stands for CRAZY!!

By the way, hard copies of the CD are for sale at the band’s website for six bucks postage paid, for you weirdos who insist on having something to hold in your hands and look at and then sell to the local used record store when you run outta cigarette money in a few months.

Tommy Smelfiger
Minister of Propaganda
TIRC Exitprises